I’m a massive book nerd. I’ve always been one. I loved reading so much I became an English major. But, I’m not the kind of English major who is super highbrow and only reads the classics. I love self-improvement books, thrillers, mysteries, fantasy, and sci-fi. Oh, and I love a good romance novel too. Who doesn’t? So, I’m going to share the books that I totally dig and highly recommend.
Categories
Nonfiction
Patriarchy Stress Disorder by Dr. Valerie Rein
Last March, on a whim, I signed up to attend Dr. Valerie Rein’s The Thriving Experience.
I made a deal with myself that if I got in, I’d buy the book. I got it. So, I bought the book and binge read it until the retreat began.
Between the book and the retreat, it awoke something in me.
My desire.
My desire to get out of surviving and into thriving.
I knew that what I’d been doing wasn’t working aka feeling a fun cocktail of constant stress and exhaustion with an unpredictable dash of anxiety. I’d ask myself ‘what’s wrong with me? Why can’t I do these simple things that everyone else can do?’
That’s when it finally clicked. It wasn’t me. It was psd.
Women in Tech by Tarah Wheeler
As someone who is transitioning from a career as a teacher to a Full Stack Developer, learning the realities of the tech world has been super valuable. Wheeler does an excellent job laying out the basics on everything women need to know from mentorship to resumes to maternity leave. I particularly loved reading stories written by a variety of women in tech. Learning how they got into tech and understanding their path to success has helped me figure out if this is the correct career move. The book’s made me really excited to begin my journey in tech. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is interested in a career in tech and wants to know what the career will be like.
Beyond the Pill by Dr. Jolene Brighten
Whoa. I loved this book. I’ve been on and off birth control for over ten years. I loved being on the pill because I had control over not getting pregnant. However, on December 30th, 2019, I got a giant blood clot in my shoulder from it. Yes. Blood clots are a side effect. This meant that I had to immediately stop taking birth control pills and get on blood thinners. Once the blood clot was gone, and I was off the blood thinners, I realized that I was having some hormonal issues. Aka Post-Birth Control Syndrome (PBCS). I never knew this was a thing until I read this book. Another thing I didn’t know was how much birth control pills disrupt your gut health. In order to restore my hormones and gut health, I did the 30 day diet to be kinder to my body. It’s quite similar to a paleo diet. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is taking birth control or getting off birth control to be more knowledgeable about your body and learn how to better take care of it.
Why Won’t You Apologize? by Harriet Lerner Ph.D.
As someone who becomes quite defensive when being criticized, learning how to apologize has been something that I’ve always wanted to work on. I loved learning that using “but,” “if,” “I’m sorry I made you feel that way” in an apology doesn’t actually count as an apology. These words deflect your part in the situation. What you’re actually supposed to do is sit and listen. Truly listening makes the other person feel heard and begins the healing process. I really wish I had this book when I was going through some difficult situations. But, now I have some more tools in my toolbox on how to better approach either giving an apology or asking for one. I recommend this book to anyone who wants to know how to genuinely say “I’m sorry.”
No Ememies Within by Dawna Markova Ph.D.
This book is slightly woowoo, which is why I totally love it. One of the many super messed up things about the education system in the US is that we do not learn our learning pattern. Your learning pattern tells you how your brain processes new information. Typically, teachers teach based on how they prefer to learn. My experience sitting silently at a desk and listening to a lecture did not complement my learning style at all. I am KVA (Kinesthetic, Visual, Auditory). This means that I don’t like sitting still and listening for hours on end. It drains me. I much prefer walking and talking. Knowing your learning style will help you tap into your creativity and inner self. So, I highly recommend this book if you’re ready to dig deep and better understand yourself.
Money a Love Story by Kate Northrup
I’m obsessed with Kate Northrup. Her first novel Money a Love Story didn’t disappoint. Her book is a practical guide on changing your relationship to money. Throughout the chapters, Kate provides various exercises to help you uncover the money story that you tell yourself. The exercises are designed to help you change that narrative. She also briefly explains some financial concepts like Passive Income and Residual Income. She beautifully articulates why you need to change the way you think about Linear Income. I’d always thought that getting a higher paying job, working more hours, getting an advanced degree would help solve my financial problems and lead me to financial independence. But, she taught me to start thinking “of ways of making money that free up your time, the ultimate commodity”. This book is a great introduction to Kate Northrup and her brilliance.
Writing the Mind Alive: The Proprioceptive Method for Find Your Authentic Voice by Linda Trichter, Tobin Simon
I’d first heard about Proprioceptive Writing on a podcast. I respected the author who recommended it, so I tried it out. And, I loved it. I’ve been practicing this style of writing daily for the past few months. Basically, it’s a specific, ritualized style of writing created by Linda and Tobin in the 1970s. Proprioceptive Writing is meant to be both therapeutic and meditative. It can be used as a way “to establish a new relation to your own thinking so that you do not feel imprisoned or weighed down by it; to lessen your psychological suffering; to find greater clarity of mind; and to develop compassion”. The ritual is pretty simple. Step 1 is to light a candle. Step 2 is to put on some Baroque music, preferably Bach. Step 3 is to set a timer for 22-25 minutes. Step 4 is to open the document. They recommend pen on paper, but I prefer to type. Step 5 is to center. Step 6 is to write until the timer goes off. During and after the write, there are some questions you ask yourself to dig deeper on your thoughts and reflect on your writing. I’ve found it as a pretty powerful way to write, so I highly recommend reading the book to learn more about it.
Learning How to Learn by Barbara Oakley Ph.D. and Terrence Sejnowski Ph.D.
Learning How to Learn has numerous helpful study techniques explained at a kid level. They also have a class on Coursera called Learning How to Learn: Powerful mental tools to help you master tough subjects, which is based on the book. I particularly resonated with Oakley’s story because she wasn’t a math person, but through self-teaching and these techniques she became a Professor of Engineering. One technique that’s been helping me become a math person is understanding the difference between Focused Mode and Diffused Mode. Focused Mode happens when you “turn on” parts of your brain by focusing intently. Diffused Mode happens when you take a break and let your brain relax. Recommended types of breaks are exercising, cooking, napping, or something that allows your brain to stop focusing on the problem. When you return from the break, you’ll more than likely have a new idea on how to solve the problem. I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants easy, effective study techniques.
The Art of Gathering by Priya Parker
During Covid, I haven’t been able to gather as I once did. This book has really helped me reflect on how I want to show up when I’ve gatherings with friends and family in the future. Parker explained the importance of setting an intention on why you’re gathering and how to create an experience for everyone to remember. She provides many examples and ideas of how she’s created memorable events from her personal and professional life. My favorite gathering that I want to try was called “15 Toasts”, where she invited 15 people, selected a topic, and required each guest to share a story about the topic. In order to encourage the guests to be vulnerable, the host needs to set the tone by sharing a story that’s deeper than she expects the guests to go. I highly recommend this book to anyone who wants to be more intentional when spending time with people.
Fantasy
The House in the Cerulean Sea by T.J. Klune
Omg this was the sweetest, most charming book I’ve read in a long time. It’s set in a world with some sort of authoritarian government, where people are cogs in the machine. Kinda like 1984 with fantastical people, but not at all depressing. It’s a love story. Linus, the main character, is a case worker, who visits orphanages and makes recommendations if they should or shouldn’t stay open. He’s a by the book kinda person, who has a reputation for staying objective. He’s sent on this super secret assignment by the government, and that’s where things start to get interesting. I highly recommend this book if you need a heart-warming, tear-invoking read.
Riot Baby by Tochi Onyebuchi
Riot Baby is a haunting story that examines the power of the past and how it bleeds into the present. It takes place in a fantastical world that’s very similar to our present. Ella and Kevin are siblings, but Ella has magical powers. She can see people’s memories and their future. Ella tries to protect Kevin, but he ends up in jail. While Kevin is in jail, Ella becomes ghostlike wandering across the country, seeing the injustices, and remembering it all. In Kevin’s dreams, she shows him what she sees and what needs to be done for societal change. I recommend this book if you’re looking for hope of a future that’s more than an illusion of freedom. Sonya Renee Taylor beautifully links this idea of a new future to our current times when she said: “We will not go back to normal. Normal never was. Our pre-corona existence was not normal other than we normalized greed, inequity, exhaustion, depletion, extraction, disconnection, confusion, rage, hoarding, hate and lack. We should not long to return, my friends. We are being given the opportunity to stitch a new garment. One that fits all of humanity and nature”.
Mystery
Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas
What price are you willing to pay to escape your past and find a home? Catherine House by Elisabeth Thomas is a huanting read about a prep school and the mysteries that haunt its walls. The novel explores whether or not you can truly escape your past and have a fresh start. Or, will it always be there to haunt you? Time and memories blur as you get sucked into Catherine’s Labyrinth, trying to figure out what is behind each door. Catherine House was a much needed escape that’s still got me thinking about it.
Memoir
Love Warrior by Glennon Doyle
Love Warrior is a tale of Doyle’s homecoming. Her journey to return to her body by finding her feminine energy and learning how to listen to her inner voice. She explains that the Journey of the Warrior “is learning that pain, like love, is simply something to surrender to.” I’ve been on my journey to surrender to the universe and trust in the process. It’s encouraging to know from her firsthand experience that if you surrender you won’t die. People don’t die from feeling. People die from not feeling. I recommend reading this book if you’re ready to join Glennon on a journey that will challenge your beliefs and give you confidence to start your own journey.
Dance of the Dissident Daughter by Sue Monk Kidd
Dance of the Dissident Daughter is Kidd’s experience becoming an awakened woman. She explains her transformation from a woman controlled by the patriarchy to a woman living a life of her own design. Due to the patriarchal power over everything, women internalize the feeling of less than. The constant reminder of feeling less than creates an internal wound aka the feminine wound. In order to heal the feminine wound, Kidd states that you need to “Just accept what is and be with it, really be with it, because when you do that you are being in the moment, in the truth. You are being present as you live your life”. When the wound is healed, you’ll stop contributing to the patriarchy and start living a life of your own design. I highly recommend this book to anyone who’s on a spiritual journey, looking for an example of a woman who has gone through the process.
Untamed by Glennon Doyle
I loved Untamed. Doyle covers it all with very insightful, personal stories from addiction to courage to love to racism to the patriarchy to anxiety and depression. Her willingness to share her vulnerabilities is what makes Doyle’s work so relatable. She’s a testament of staying in the “messy middle”, AND emerging anew on the other side. As Doyle states, some women “must stay, because it’s that time for them, because they have to know what love and God and freedom are not before they can know what love and God and freedom are”. She, like many who decide to enter the “messy middle”, needed to stay and “do hard things” in order to be able to turn towards love and God and freedom. I highly recommend this book if you’re looking for a binge worthy read about finding your wildness.
Historical
The Book of Longings by Sue Monk Kidd
Sue Monk Kidd’s The Book of Longings hit all the right spots. It’s historical fiction meets love story meets suspense meets best Biblical story ever. Had religion class or church ever talked about something this interesting, things may have ended up very differently. Loved it. The powerful words that reverberated my soul: “I am a voice.” I’m still reflecting on the power of being seen, heard, witnessed, remembered.
The Rib King by Ladee Hubbard
Embarrassing as it is to admit, I hadn’t read a book for a really long time, but The Rib King by Ladee Hubbard snapped me out of it. Until I started reading this book, I didn’t realize what I’d been missing out on. The Rib King transported me into another time, which is one of the many reasons why I love historical fiction. The novel plays with loyalty, revenge, racism, amends, survival, entrepreneurship, and so much more. It was an eye-opening, unpredictable tale that was exactly what I wanted in a book.
Circe by Madeline Miller
I loved Circe. Circe is a Greek goddess. She’s the daughter of Helios, who’s got witchy powers. The reader gets to experience Greek mythology from her perspective. I’d always had a hard time connecting with some of the Greek myths like the stories of Odysseus or Icarus or the Minotaur. However, Miller brings the gods and goddesses to life in a way that I could imagine I was there. It was the experience I wanted to have when I originally interacted with these classics. It’s such a delightful book that creates a world with characters that I thoroughly enjoyed.
Spirituality
Mary Magdalene Revealed by Meggan Watterson
In Mary Magdalene Revealed, Watterson takes us on her healing journey to balance the imbalance of masculinity found in the Christian tradition. For centuries, there’s been this division and acceptance that the ‘masculine’ way is superior to the ‘feminine’ way. This ‘either or’ mentality is causing a great rift within us. However, what we forget is that “we are both male and female, masculine and feminine, light and dark, conscious and unconscious, human and angel, divine and animal. We forget that we are all actually undivided”. Watterson brings balance to the imbalance through interpreting Mary Magdalene’s Gospel, which shows a feminine version of Jesus’ teachings. Learning the importance of Mary Magdalene in Jesus’ life and the historical role women played in Christianity has been very healing for me as well because it confirmed what I knew and felt, but never heard in the Catholic church. I highly recommend this book if you want to learn how accepting the ‘both and’ and uniting the division within yourself will help you move towards the love inside of you.
Astrology
Cosmic Health by Jennifer Racioppi
Cosmic Health by Jennifer Racioppi is the perfect mixture of positive psychology with astrology. This results in a powerful tool to learn more about yourself, so that you can fully show up in the world to do your part. I loved learning about my Scorpio ♏️ sun, Leo ♌️ moon, and Libra ♎️ rising, plus all the other planets in my chart. It’s a wonderful guide that I keep picking up whenever I need to revisit the phases of the moon or need ideas for a ritual. Cosmic Health is a great place to being on the self-exploratory journey.
YA
Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Avecedo
I’ve been on tons of flights, where everyone clapped when the plane landed. I didn’t truly understand why until I read Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Avecedo.
As Yahaira, one of the main characters explains:
“I imagine it’s kind of giving thanks.
Of all the ways it could end
it ends not with us in the sky or the water,
but together
on solid earth
safely grounded.”
Powerful. I never thought I liked poetry until I read Elizabeth Avecedo’s books. Clap When You Land is a beautiful story of sisterhood and the power of women. It begins with an unraveling. Two worlds ripped apart by a tragic accident. But, through grieving, forgiving, and healing the two worlds merge together in unexpected ways. So good.